Entry 1
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"Men look at women. Women watch themselves being looked at."
-John Berger |
The image still burns in her mind.
She looks around to see who is watching and scoots to the edge of her seat, making sure her thighs are not touching [a sigh of relief]. She looks down and examines her body as she walks [a little slower to stop the jiggling]. When she goes to the grocery store the image is yelling at her. "CHECK THE CALORIES!" [no. no. no. no.] Passing on the crackers and chocolate covered almonds, she leaves with frozen veggies and 80 calorie yogurt cups. She feels good, yet deprived. Tomorrow she's determined not to care so much.
ah-oo-ga. ah-oo-ga. She turns off her phone alarm and lays in bed, thinking.
- what the heck am i going to wear today? probably pants because everything else makes you look like a heifer.
- yogurt will have to do for breakfast. i should have gotten the fat free granola to go with it. but it was 210 calories for 1/4 a cup...not worth it.
- UUUGH, i need to work out today. maybe my roommates will go with me.
Two jeans and four shirts later, she finds an outfit she feels decent in [why does everything look so bad?] Forty-two seconds are then spent looking at every possible angle [whatever. it'll work.] Not convincing herself, she fears no one else will be convinced either. She tightens her stomach muscles to appear an inch thinner and walks out the door. Her reflection that morning will stay with her and effect every move she makes.
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Entry 2
On her drive home, she starts to wonder why she thinks so negatively about herself. [i can't remember anyone putting pressure on me to look a certain way and no one has ever negatively commented on my shape.] She looks in the rear view mirror, almost in tears.
Looking through some old stuff she uncovers a few home videos and kindergarden projects that her mom has held on to. Nothing suggested her weight was ever a problem. When she comes across a box of photos, she smiles. There she is on the happiest day of her life - Disneyland.
She remembers holding her father's hand,
anxiously waiting to go inside Cinderella's Castle
to meet the beautiful princesses from her favorite movies.
[i used to love the dresses they wore,
their long flowing hair, and the way they
always ended up marrying the guy of their dreams --]
[wait a minute!]
All of those years dressing up as Jasmine, Cinderella, and Belle; learning to be flawless. [but that's impossible.] She starts to question her entire upbringing: the toys, the books, the magazines, the television. [i've been brainwashed.]
She sat for a minute - realizing the effect society has had on her. [oh my.]
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Entry 3
Lions, Tigers, Bears.
[wouldn't it be nice to be an animal; not a care in the world; no worries about being 'the right' size or having 'the right' look.] She thinks looking in the mirror as she tries on hundred $$$ hats.
"This hat makes my face look fat."
"How can a hat make you look fat?"
"I don't know, it makes my face rounder than it normally is. Which one do you think is the most flattering?"
"You're going to the Kentucky Derby; you don't need the most flattering hat, you need a fabulous one. I like the fourth hat you tried on - the purple one. It'll make you stand out in the glamours of the crowd."
Two bloody marries down and she starts to forget about her insecurities.
Alcohol does that to her. She doesn't eat much, so when she does, it hits her fast.
Her father sees an empty hand and buys her a mint julep.
two's company, three's a crowd
Her third drink is always the emotional one.
"Can I have another?!"
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Entry 4
The next day was spent recuperating
on the couch with water and Tylenol. She turned on a Sex
and the City marathon to drown out the noisy birds singing a familiar tune near her livingroom window. She was currently on the episode four in season
three, “Boy, Girl, Boy, Girl.” She loved this episode because Charlotte dresses
as a drag king model for one of the artists in the gallery she works at. It
amused her how easily people can change their outer appearances.
Z
Z
Z
Z
Z
.
. . How can anyone tell what's real?
She was passing a news stand when she was forced to
stop by a pair of familiar eyes. They were hers, and they were on the cover of Woman’s Health. Her body was missing, and
in its place was the body of a much leaner woman. But then she saw it: her
birthmark. It had to be her body, she had never seen anyone else with a treble clef
on inside of their thigh, at least not a natural one. She looked down to
verify that she was who she thought she was.
[what
the heck? who is that?]
The attendant noticed the confused look on her face,
and thought she should know the truth - "the distinction between ‘reality’ and ‘the
real’: the one is displayed, the other demonstrated” (Barthes 175).
‘CARRIE! CARRIE!” She looked back to see Charlotte
waving her down.
“claire,
claire.”
Her
dad woke her up to make sure she didn’t need anything from the store.
“No, I’m fine. Thanks.”
She noticed a magazine laying on the ground beside
the couch.
[liar.]
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Her body.
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Entry 5
[Bikini Ready in 7 Days? Yes, please show me how!]
Summer time means vacation time.
Her family had planned a trip to California and she had one week until she could feel the comfort of the sun bleached sand cling to her body.
It was not what she wanted it to be.
She made a check list:
[]Thighs
[]Arms
[]Butt
[]Abs
[large to small in seven days?]
She made a check list:
[]Thighs
[]Arms
[]Butt
[]Abs
[large to small in seven days?]
LARGE
BARGE
SARGE
SERGE
SHELF
SHELL
SMELL
SMALL
It wasn't going to be easy.
She didn't reach her goal, and she felt foolish sitting on the beach in shorts and a t-shirt.
Her Aunt told her to that she wan't going to get any color if she stayed in her clothes.
Her younger brother wanted her to play in the water with him.
Why was she so uncomfortable? It was her family. The people who have watched her grow up, the people that helped her with anything she needed. She thought about this for a while.
She didn't reach her goal, and she felt foolish sitting on the beach in shorts and a t-shirt.
Her Aunt told her to that she wan't going to get any color if she stayed in her clothes.
Her younger brother wanted her to play in the water with him.
Why was she so uncomfortable? It was her family. The people who have watched her grow up, the people that helped her with anything she needed. She thought about this for a while.
[who cares?!]
Off with the clothes and into the water.
“You must live in the present, launch yourself on every wave, find your eternity in each moment. Fools stand on their island of opportunities and look toward another land. There is no other land; there is no other life but this.”
-henry david thoreau
This post is commenting on the struggle a woman goes through on an everyday basis. It takes place in her mind and focusses on her body image issues. (I know men also face societal expectations, but women are at the center). I chose to use a picture of my sister's eyes because they are the channel we see ourselves and others through. Eyes are also a thing of beauty and therefore a thing of power. The picture is black and white because I thought it would be easier for people to relate to and sympathize with. I chose to title my blog "Iron Maiden" because it is an ancient torture device and women ‘torture’ themselves in order to live up to the beauty standard set by our society. The repetitive images running down the side represent the constant perceptions, thoughts, and feelings that run through our minds on repeat.
ReplyDeleteThe author creates a concrete portrait of a particular mental state. This concrete portrait is made possible through careful detail depicted through the bloggers own eyes. Through the writing, the reader is transported to the mind of a struggling female. The concept of body image and who am I as reflected through the mirror is epitomized in the blog posting.
ReplyDeleteThe background to the blog is simple, and allows the reader to focus on the words typed by the blogger. Down the left side is a repetitive image of a shadow looking in a mirror. This image reminds the reader how prevalent image appears in our societies and our minds. The black and white background help to represent how one sided our own views of ourselves can often be.
The format of writing helps the blog convey that the mindset portrayed is the everyday and norm for the blogger, rather than a state of distress or rare moment. By approaching the blog using the stream of consciousness, the blogger opens their mind to the audience. Parenthesis, quotations, bold, and capitals help underscore important thoughts like “COUNT THE CALORIES.” Listing initial thoughts upon waking help emphasize how routine this mindset is, and how the mindset is a place well known.
The simple photo of eyes at the beginning of the blog with the subtitled quote helps transport the reader to a place of self-reflection. The quote seems to be insinuating that men are the scapegoats for the reason women lack self-confidence and are obsessive about their reflection. The quote leads into the bloggers ideas on reflection and personal appraisal of that reflection in the mirror.
The blog successfully transports reader into the particular mindset of the blogger. This mindset is focused on analyzing an individual’s reflection. The blog also urges the reader to take an introspective look through analyzing the blogger
(I hope I'm posting this in the right place since it seems like you've put all your entries in one post...)
ReplyDeleteWhile the white background really makes the colored images pop, I can't help but to feel like it makes the blog look very stark and almost unfinished. The black and white image of the cartoon figure looking into a mirror conveys the significance of the meaning behind it, but I think it would be a bit more relevant to the content of the blog post if the figure was female. The connection between Disney princesses and unrealistic societal expectations on women's appearance is very appropriate to the narrative. Millions of little girls at their most impressionable age grow up watching these ultra-feminine, flawless representations of women. The Disney theme of this blog post also made it quite easy to tie into my own blog, which is set in Orlando, so I really can't complain too much. The image of the seven popular Disney princesses directly correlates to the text, and although the majority of readers are probably familiar with these characters, it is a nice visual refresher to refer to when reading the narrative. I also like how the speech bubble above this image, "Of course you do! Everyone wants to be like us..." appears as if the words are being spoken by the princesses themselves. The use of italics, bold text, and brackets aids in emphasizing certain passages and gives the reader a glimpse into the thoughts of the narrator.
When I was first given this assignment, I was a little intimidated because I knew I would have less control over what I wanted to say. Once the first two blog assignments were done, however, I got the hang of it and it was easier for me to incorporate the ideas of others into my own ideas. I think I did well on these assignments and made it easy for the reader to follow my threads (or so I thought). I didn't like the way the entries were displayed by the most recent date, so I just kept adding context to my first entry. I made sure I separated the entries so that the reader would not be confused. By doing this, my entries are chronological and the reader doesn't have to scroll down and then up to read everything. I love that all of our blogs interact with 4+ other blogs and websites. The stories then become even more complex when you try to draw a connection between the two linked texts. Walter Benjamin says, "Technical reproduction can put the copy of the original into situations which would be out of reach for the original itself" (220). He was talking about photography, but I think our blogs, and the internet in general, is also the perfect representation of this. If my blog didn't link to the other blogs, people who visit my blog would probably never have been exposed to those other blogs and the topics they discuss. By allowing interconnectivity, people are learning and being forced to think critically about the relationships between the written word, images, and everything else they come in contact with.
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed seeing how different everyone's blogs were and how we all interpreted the formats and images. I found myself liking the blogs that used different font styles and sizes and changed the direction of their writing better than the more tradition blogs. That being said, I wasn't a fan of the blogs that had busy background pictures. It made it difficult to read and I don't think that's what they were going for. Overall, I think these blog assignments were a great way for us to see how every text comes with its own context, and that reproductions of these texts are then put into different contexts.